That word has been used to describe me, often. Mom and Dad
also bore me with a story telling of my love / passion for bring home
"stray dogs" and helping the "under dogs." (Guess I'm a bit
understanding and sympathetic to people's differences.)
With the joys of managing a household by myself and singly working
on house updates the realization of how
completely and totally sheltered I have been throughout life keeps hitting me
in the head. I'm a cute white girl with
wonderfully supportive parents who 's only wish was for my sister and I to live
a happy and easy life. Partner that with an ex who did everything for me... And I end up with an existence of having lived a comfortable middle class life
without a lot of hardships...
Until.... Until... Until I decided to break out of my cage; take
the world in my hands and shake it the H-E-Double Hockey Sticks up!!! Now, more
and more I gain a new or deeper understanding of people and what life might be like for them.
What's that proverb? "To understand a man, you've got to walk a mile in
his shoes."
Truthfully, I don't want to walk a mile in some of the shoes
I've tried on lately. The few baby steps I have stumbled are plenty for me to
get a glimpse of the bigger picture....
- I understand how people become hoarders, collecting and collecting things... just in case and not knowing how to stop.
- I understand not being able to focus on anything besides... just... paying... bills. There's no room for self awareness when you're worried about keeping warm at night.
- I understand what it means to be overwhelmed with one project that you can't see anything else. Anything at all... Like the dirty floor in the kitchen, or the long grass in the front yard.
- I understand how easy it is to keep following the downward spiral falling farther and farther away from who you are. I understanding how hard it is to pull yourself up, one anguishing ring at a time through the water and wind filled tunnel that continually pushes you down.
On the flip side--I tried on some shoes I WANT to buy in
bulk. I want a stash so that no matter how warn or tattered they are, I'll rejuvenate
with a fresh pair to put on and keep going.
- I understand what it feels like to stand on my own 2 feet (admittedly, with lots of support) learning how to become "strong."
- I understand how much power the phrase "I DID IT!" has.
- I understand the joys hidden within a peaceful morning; knowing there's no limit to what I can accomplish.
The last 10 months have opened my eyes and heart to many things.
Some were events I thought I "knew". Others are situations I never
imagined I would experience. Some are burdens people manage everyday without
telling a soul.
I don't have a clue where the yellow brick road is going to
take me.... I don't know how many more shoes I get to try on... I only know I'm
not going to judge other people before checking out their mukluks first.
How about you? What shoes are your wearing today? Do you
wanna trade for a bit?
